An obese young girl came into my gym today reeking of cigarette smoke.

How fast can you make me skinny? She chortled, much to the amusement of her equally obese companion, who guffawed loudly but apparently had no interest in my answer, since she never took her eyes off the keyboard of her phone.

We don’t make people skinny, I replied with a smile. We make people healthy.

Look, I got my sister’s wedding in a month and a half and I don’t give a damn about being healthy. All I want is to fit into a size 16 bridesmaid’s dress ‘cause that’s the biggest size they make. After that, I don’t give a fuck if I ever see the inside of a gym ever again.

I mustered every ounce of restraint I could to not throw her a left hook, and somehow managed to maintain a cheery demeanor when I told her,

Ah, you don’t want what we have to offer here, then. But the CVS down the road sells all kind of effedrine laced diet supplements, if you’re looking for a quick fix and don’t mind risking a heart attack to get it.

The companion finally looked up from her phone to sneer at me.

Let’s go, she commanded, and the two of them turned their backs and left.

I watched them light up on the other side of the plate glass and I wondered what to make of a society that shudders in fear of bomb wielding dissidents, while it is simultaneously killing itself by it’s own hand.

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  5. vermilionborder said: They’re young; they’ll learn. :)
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